This broke my heart :(
When someone signs up for my VIP list, I send out an email asking them to fill me in on their biggest struggle. Is it nutrition? Exercise? Mindset? or Motivation?
I’d say 90% of the responses I read say motivation is the thing they struggle with the most. The motivation to eat well, to exercise, to put themselves first. They just can’t seem to find it…..
Here’s my take on motivation, and I’ve said this a million times, but here’s a million and one 🙂
It’s not going to just “show up” and drag you to the gym or slap your hand when you reach for cookies.
YOU are the one who is in control. YOU create your own motivation.
This can look differently for everyone, but maybe you write down your goals, read some inspiring quotes, make a vision board, watch a motivational YouTube video, say your affirmations, look through photos of when you felt your best, read a book about someone who inspires your, listen to music, try on your favorite outfit, look over the results from your last blood test or physical – whatever fires you up and brings you back to the reason why you started, or why you want to start – you need to do that – and do it often.
The thing is we can’t just *wait* for motivation to show up. We can’t wait for New Year’s, vacations, weddings or whatever to light that motivational flame.
Of course things like that can help, but relying on things like that is kind of lazy, isn’t it? They come and go and we’re just left waiting for the next thing to come along, when we could take matters into our own hands and create our own motivation on a daily basis.
I know, that’s a tough pill to swallow. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but honestly, we are the only ones in control of our thoughts and our actions.
Saying, “I’m just not motivated” is just reinforcing the fact that you’re doing anything to change it.
It’s not like you would look at a leak on your cieling and say,
“It’s just not stopping”
“I really wish it would stop leaking”
“Geez, it wasn’t leaking before, but now it is, I wonder when it will stop?”
“Wow, that big brown spot on my ceiling is just getting bigger”
NOOOO. You’d DO something about the damn leak!
You’d google “leak on ceiling” or call a plumber.
You wouldn’t call your friends and say,
“I’m just waiting for a plumber to show up…..No, I haven’t called him….No, I haven’t looked anything up on how to change the fact that my ceiling is going to cave in”….
But it’s so much easier to place the blame on the “motivation” that just isn’t showing up isn’t it?
Damn you, motivation. How DARE you not show up when I need you!
That’s the easy way out. That doesn’t take any work.
We complain and we wait.
We wait for the “right time”, or when we have “more time”…..the excuses just keep piling up.
But just like watching the leak on your cieling and not calling your plumber – it doesn’t help, and you’re in the same situation, if not a worse one.
Listen guys – motivation is fleeting. Think about it. How many times have you started a new diet or an exercise program and you’re all gung-ho for like 2 weeks and then you’re like, “Ugg, I just have no motivation”.
Why is that?
Typically it’s because we’ve stopped doing what got us motivated in the first place.
We haven’t revisited our goals.
We stopped saying our affirmations.
We’ve stopped planning and preparing our food.
We’ve skipped a few workouts.
We’ve listened to our “excuse” voice that’s telling us that “it’s not worth it” or “why bother” or “I’ll worry about it tomorrow, or Monday, or in January”.
We stop posting in our coaching groups!
We avoid doing the very things we did to get us pumped up in the first place.
And then we give up.
And I say “we”, because I’m right there with you. I couldn’t write about it if I haven’t experienced it.
I’ve written before about how I was the queen of starting over on Monday. I had the, “I deserve this, I’ve worked SO hard all week” excuse down pat.
I got really good at telling myself that, “a little of this doesn’t make that much of a difference”, or “skipping today’s workout is ok because I’ll just double up tomorrow”.
I got really good at it because that is what I practiced. Every. Single. Week.
We get really good at what we practice. You practice starting over every Monday, you’re going to get really good at listening to your excuses telling you that you should just start on Monday.
You practice sitting around waiting for motivation to slap you in the face – you get really good at sitting around and waiting for things to happen for you.
Maybe, instead of giving up or waiting around, you take a few minutes to think about why you started in the first place.
You take some ACTION. Just as you would with anything else that wasn’t working properly.
Electricity goes out? You take action.
You want a promotion? You take action.
Kid does something terrible? You take action.
You don’t just sit there saying,
“oh geez, I hope the lights go on”
“I really hope I get that promotion (without working for it)
“wow, I hope he doesn’t strangle his baby sister again”
You DO SHIT to take control of the situation. You don’t just *wait* and hope that it all works out. You take control and you do what it takes to create the outcome you want.
Today I want you to take the time to create some motivation.
What motivated you in the past?
How can you harness that motivation again?
How can you TAKE ACTION – TODAY – to bring you just a bit closer to what you want to accomplish?